“But here I must confide to your Excellency the confession of my private adventures.” The beautiful Consafeia multiplied day by day to me of politeness… which ended in the fact that she gave me her hand… “
Letter N. N. Rezanova N. Rumyantsev June 17, 1806
“Let them appreciate my deed as they please, but with the help of God I hope to fulfill it well, to me the first of the Russians here…”
N. Rezanov – directors of the Russo-Amer. the company
November 6, 1805
INTRODUCTION. Our schooner is called “Maybe.” “Maybe” is our faith and our motto. We are few, we are apart, we have zero chances against a thousand, but we survive, we master on “Maybe.” When “Ave Maria” is powerless, the supernatural “Avos” helps to atheistic Russia. “Maybe” will take out and help out. And when we drop the hoofs, a poem with a name starting with “Avos” will write about us.
I. PROLOGUE. In San Francisco piracy “Avos”: the governor’s daughter sleeps at the Russian on his shoulder. She was sixteen the day before yesterday. At the curtains, facing the wings, stand Catholicism and Orthodoxy. On the post, talk with Dovydov Khvastov.
II. X v a tt ov. And what do you think, Dovydov… Dovydo. On the origin of species? X V aTSOV. Well no…
III. From the San Franciscan belltower, the young lady
“Mother Intercessor, strengthen me.” I fell in love with the stranger, I fell in love for the glory of risk, for teaching me the words of a new country… I am a state criminal: “Hand me over as a woman to a woman.” But how can you understand me, which did not like? As a niche our universe, which chose the god of your son, the fruit of the spirit and dislike! “
And the Immaculate replied: “Daughter…” And they continued to whisper further…
IV. X v a tt ov. And what do you think, Dovydov… Dovydo. How to uplift the Germans and the Pieta? X V aTSOV. Well no…
V. “Well, what else do you need from me? I was from a simple family, but I’ve learned, I’ve discovered new lands, ruined your whole life in the name of Yours.” Why are you depriving me of the last pleasure? “She’s so ignorant…”
And out of the robe came out tired and said: “I love you.” No, I need you.
VI. Khvastov asks Dovydov that he thinks about the Rezanovo woman, and at this moment sees in the sky a cloud of a virgin.
VII. At the wedding of Rezanov and Konch, servants with oranges in wine were not updated. Purple pop tight wedding rings they tried on not. Dovydov and Khvastov drove into the dining room on horses, and they were not taken out. Where are these guests? The night is empty. Only two crosses lie, messed up.
Archival documents related to the case Rezanova N. P.
No. 1. N. Rezanov writes to N. Rumyantsev that the name of the monarch will be more blessed when the Russians overthrow slavery to foreign peoples…
No. 2. Rezanov writes to II Dmitriev that he is looking for new lands to settle a new race there, to create a Third World – without money and crowns. By the way, he asks to help in the court of his marriage to an American.
№ 3. Extract from the history of the years. Dovydova and Khvastova. It follows that Dovydov and Khvastov were shot at a duel, then became friends and together waved to Rezanov in the Far East.
Rezanov in the Second Secret Letter describes Mr. X… who, having entered the newly bought “Yunona” ship, opened drunkenness, which lasted three months, and during this time drank 91/2 buckets of French vodka and 2 1/2 buckets of strong alcohol. Spoiled all ships. On drunken business every night was anchored, but, fortunately, the sailors were constantly drunk…
Next comes the report of Dovydov and Khvastov about their annexation to the territory of the empire of the five eastern islands, then an extract from “The report of midshipman Davidov in the apartment is already under the political guard.”
№ 6. “Nikolai Rezanov was a perspicacious politician. Live Rezanov for 10 years longer, what we now call California and American British Columbia, would be a Russian territory.”
Admiral Van Ders.
No. 7. From Rezanov’s letter to Derzhavin. Rezanov said that he was in the hands of the next transfer of odes Horace “Monument”, made “one gishpantsom.” Next is the text of the transcription: “I am the last poet of civilization, not of any specific, but of civilization as such, because in the era of spiritual crisis culture becomes the most disgraceful phenomenon.” For these words my contemporaries will strike me, and future Afro-Euro-American-Asians will prove the absurdity of my arguments, lay down new songs, dance, write new books… This will be a monument! “
№ 10. Description of how Rezanov made the proposal of the Consafezia, how their parents opposed to their marriage and how they finally gave their consent.
11. Rezanov-Konche. Rezanov tells the bride of Russia, where silver nightingales sing, where the temple of the Mother of God stands near the pond and its snow-white kontroforsy, like horses, drink water with the taste of a miracle and thyme.
In a year they will return to Russia – Rezanov will achieve the consent of the tsar, the Pope and the father of Concha!
IX. She admits that she is a sinner before nature. She was not happy with Christmas bells. On the contrary, they seemed to her funeral, sounding on her unborn love. Spirit is exactly what arises between two lovers, it does not deny the flesh. Therefore, I want to extinguish all the churches in exchange for the opportunity to kiss lips in tobacco.
EPILOGUE. In a year he will die in Krasnoyarsk. She will throw the dead fruit and become the first San Francisco nun.